Fosters

I went to fosters yesterday! Wow it was great to see my coach and Ashley! It was also good to spend some time outside. none of us were really in the mood to swim- except will- so we basically just worked routes. I got on Gaschamber? i think thats what its called-(sorry if thats not it) and eclipse. Eclipse kicked my ass. I fell sooooo many times, and am so thankful Tim put up with my crap instead of saying get over your fear of leading. But then again hes not that type of person (most of the time.lol) But i was really scared to take some of the falls. On the third lip of it , with the bolt low ( or for me low below me) below me, i freaked. i started shaking ,which i hope no one could tell because im really embarresed to be scared, and was almost to the point of tears-when i said " shit! take" so tim got ready to catch me- but i wouldnt let go- till i finally gave up ( with some encourgment from my friends/teamates) and was shaking while swinging back and forth. but hey, that was only my forth time leading. you can call me a wuss. but i really wont give a crap.

Anyways, i (Finally) got to the third bolt from the chains, but it was getting dark and i was tiiiiirrreeeeed. What a great day of climbing. My lead head got a little tiny bit stronger. but i still have lots of things to work on. One of the many being commitment to the moves. But i realized for each fall i took ,and had to start back at the bolt and do the moves again, it got easier. part of it wasbeacuse my body was learning the way to turn and move, while the other part was i wasnt getting as scared ( dont get me wrong i was scared) , so you get pumped a lot faster when your scared ( at least for me) . I need to learn to relax and trust my coach and belayer.  but all is well, except school tomorrow with a report do haha. so i think im going to go work on that.oh, and as for the boy, the arrow is pointing to "not liking me" so im letting go, or just notgiving him any show of feelings towards him until he does towards me. 

well bye for now

-zoe